The SnowHow

Author: thesnowhow

  • Drive A Stake Through The Heart Of Emotional Vampires!

    The people in your life can be an amazing source of value to you. They provide fun, conversation, entertainment, drama, information, education. They give you highs and lows and sometimes take you on an emotional roller-coaster. Some add incredible value to your life and some don’t.
    For most of us we let the good people mingle with the bad. We give equal amounts of time to each type of friends.

    Is this smart? Does this really help us?

    Well then let’s take a look at that shall we.

    I want to offer up two ideas…

    1. the emotional vampire/mood hover.
    2. the 80/20 rule/Pareto principle.

    OK so the first idea is this we all have friends that take more value than they give. Have a think about that idea. You see most people don’t (think about that.) When you think about all your friends do you rate them by who gives the most value and who takes the most value. Well neither did I.
    You see most of us have awesome friends who we love and trust and rely on, in return they do the same for us. Real friends who make our day brighter for having them in it. That when we think about seeing them our hearts and our smiles lift.

    We also have those friends who only come to us with their problems and woe. They come telling you of all their hassles and dramas most of which they cause for themselves. They never take responsibility for anything. It’s as if they go out of the way to find problems that never existed before they got involved.

    They never take advice they only want to bend your ear. They want your shoulder to cry on and your sympathy. They take take take with very little in return. This is the dead wood of your life.
    But hey, do you know what, there is an argument that there is a place for both types of people in your life. The argument is a little thin on the ground but hey some people like being that shoulder or that listener.

    I’m not here to judge, just offer a tiny bit of advice.

    Here it is…

    Make a list of the top ten most important people in your life who give you joy and pleasure and really add to the quality of your life. Pick no more than ten. (yes it gets really hard when you have to exclude people you like but do it anyway. If you like, think about the people who you would like to still be in your life five years from now.) I know that it takes a bit of effort, but you will have quite a nice feeling at the end, knowing who you think are the really important people in your life.
    There you have your list (and some clarity.)

    Here is the second part, the 80/20 part actually we are going to change it to 90/10.
    Spend 90% of your time with your top ten people and 10% with everyone else.

    I know it will be hard at the start to distance yourself from the others. Just start to learn to say no to them in a nice way.

    So they ask can they come over or for you to meet up. Just say “I can’t tonight I’ve already got plans, I’ll call you later in the week when I have time”. Don’t say a direct no just a deferred no.
    Saying no is hard, deferring is much easier.

    If they try and invite themselves to your plan again defer them.

    Next start to schedule time with your top ten. Easy you like being around them anyway.

    If you do this you will notice a marked improvement in your life. There is a popular notion that you become the average of the five people that you hang around with most.

    If this is true then you are clearly stacking the odds in your favor.

    If you want to take this to the next step then I would suggest culling your ten every six to twelve months and trying to keep improving the quality of your group that way you will have people in your group that constantly lift you and inspire you and take you to the next level.

    Keep a vigilant eye on the people in your life, and make sure no one goes lame. If they do cut them out.

    Say after me no more dead wood!

    Until next time. Question everything.

    Snowy

  • How To Always Make A Good Decision!

    Each and every one of us is constantly bombarded with the need to make decisions. Most of the times these decisions are trivial and every day things. What shall I have for lunch what color underwear shall i wear. Nothing important and very little bad can happen making these decisions.

    The thing is from time to time we run up against some really big life choice type decisions that can really affect our future.

    Should i stay in this job, should i go for that promotion. Is this person the right person for me (should i ask them to marry me). Should i buy or rent. What should i do with the rest of my life. Should i go to college of go get a job.

    Should I travel the world or settle down. Should i buy a new car or keep the one i have for one more year. You get the idea.

    There are loads of these life choices that we all eventually have to make.

    Often though we don’t have a sound methodology in order to know if we are making the right decisions. This leaves us full of doubt and causes us to worry.

    We are also given advice like go with your gut or follow your intuition. Seeming good advice but so few of us exercise our decision muscle that we are not sure if we should trust ourselves and our decisions.

    Well i have a foolproof method that will allow you to always make the right decision for yourself in the big decision moments.

    The first rule is stop.

    Don’t make any long term/big decisions in a rash moment.

    With the big decisions give yourself time. Minimum 1 minute. Preferably a great deal longer.

    Second, find a quiet spot.

    Step 3. Now this is the interesting part. You need to time trip in your head.

    Go to a place in your future where you can imagine that your are perfectly happy and content and that your life has brought you everything that you ever wanted and you are full of joy.

    (You should do this exercise anyway even if there is no decisions to make. After all we become our controlling thoughts.)

    Once you have rustled up that feeling and you can either see the place or feel how that feels and it feels or looks real we can move on.

    Step four, Now that you are in that place, bring to mind the decision that you are looking to make and ask yourself does the outcome of this decision bring me closer or further away from this place.

    You will definitely get a strong leaning one way or the other. With practice you will virtually always get the right answer to your big decision.

    More importantly you will always make the a decisions that you will be happy with so you won’t be second guessing yourself about having done the right thing. No stress, no worries and no regrets. Problem solved!

    Snowy.

  • How To Avoid The Lie Of Perfection!

    We have all been taught a lie. What is this lie i hear you ask. Well it is the lie of perfection.
    We are told in every endeavor that we must seek perfection in whatever we do. Be the best we can be. Well as much as there is some truth in this the reality is that blocks many of us from getting going.

    You see perfection is damn hard if not impossible to reach. We start an endeavor looking to make it the best possible thing/outcome.

    Let’s take two examples. Starting a business and losing weight.

    So lets look at starting a business… You come up with an idea. You believe it is a good idea. Lets say it is creating websites for builders (Hey maybe they need one, and after all they are not normally the most tech savvy folk, so there may be a gap). Ok so now we have an idea and a target market.

    So what’s next well let’s see.

    I’m going to need a website of my own to sell my services. (Hey they are going to need to see what i can do.)

    Oh and I’m going to need some business cards.. That will make me look professional.

    Oh and a logo. Can’t forget my logo after all branding is important.

    Maybe I should get a brochure done.

    Hmm well i will need to get some copy for both the website and the brochure.

    Got to set up my social media so i need to create an account on Facebook, twitter, instagram, Linkedin and youtube.

    Hmm what else well i should register my company (should have thought of that first.)

    Oh and a good name for myself why didn’t i think of that in the first place.

    Must brain storm the cleverest name that is both professional and quirky. (after all i need to be up to date with all things modern and cool.)

    Actually going back to social media i should start getting followers and likes etc after all I don’t know want my customers to think that i have not been around for a while.

    This is after all what we need to do to start a business after all right?

    Well we will get back to that in a bit.

    Now let’s look at weight loss.

    Ok so so i need to lose some weight.

    well what should i do?

    Well I know I should change my diet and maybe do some exercise but which type should i do.

    hmm i know i will search the web for weight loss see whats working at the moment.

    Oooh lots of diets to chose must do some research into which is the best one.

    So much to choose from Paleo looks popular and so does the slow carb diet. but hey i know things like the Atkins diet used to work but has sort of fallen out of favour. What about the low fat diets and the alkalizing diets? What about the Mediterranean diets and GI diets. Hmm all of these are going to need some looking into. After all I don’t want to do the wrong one.

    Maybe i should look on amazon to see which books people are reading. Hey I could also what diets the celebrities are using after all they always look good. Ok pick my five favorite celebrities and find out what diet they are doing to stay in shape.

    Speaking of staying in shape well yeh i need to do some exercise.

    Hmm should what should i do well i could go jog. Well if I’m going to go jogging I should really do it properly so I’m going to need some new running shoes. oh and the right outfit after all i don’t want to look like a slob. Oh and i need to find out how far I’ve run so i will have to get a nike fuleband or some other gadget that tracks that. Oh and the appropriate app for my phone that way I can always know just how well I’m doing. Maybe I should also get an app to keep me accountable I know i procrastinate from time to time.

    Then again is jogging the right thing for me after all there are other options.

    I could join a gym but which type a normal one or a specific one (i hear a lot of people talking about cross fit.)

    Or maybe i should buy some of them dvds from the infomercials but which one p90x looks good but then again so does Insanity and now there is that 25 minute one. ok I will watch the infomercials again.

    Then again Yoga looks like it’s relaxing, good for you and fun. Should i do know there are different varieties maybe i should look into Bikram as hot yoga is meant to be great. Then again i heard about that DDP wrestler guy who has got some great videos on youtube.

    Hmm will have to think about that to make sure that i do the right exercise for me.
    You get the idea always seeking perfection always avoiding trying to make a mistake. After all you have to remember the 5 P’s (Perfect Preparation Prevents Poor Performance).

    This is all horseshit!

    The reality is that it is far more important to get it going that get it perfect.

    This is how this should really look.

    Starting a website for builders business.

    Pick up the phone book call 20 builders ask them why they have not got a website, ask them can they see the value of a website (if they can’t explain the value) ask if they want one if you can do it at a reasonable price.

    If any say yes you have a business, If they don’t you have saved yourself countless hours, days, weeks and a ton of money.

    Losing weight.

    Diet.

    every time you feel hungry and are going to eat ask yourself what is the tastiest healthy thing I can eat right now? Eat that. Do that for one meal a day and build up from there until you reach 80% good choices for your meals.

    Exercise.

    Drop to the floor and do 1 press up. If you want to do more so be it. Add additional exercises as and when you feel like it. Do this at least 3 times a week maybe before you eat first thing.

    Perfection is a barrier to action. Without action there is no progress.

    So remove Perfection from the start of an endeavor and if you like aim for it at the end.

    Don’t seek perfection in the beginning it will cripple you before you start.

    Just start and see what happens.

    Snowy

  • You, Your Life And Winning The Kobayashi Maru!

    If you are like most people then the game of life is unwinable. Harsh but True. It’s the Kobayashi Maru.If you are unfamiliar with the Kobayashi Maru well it’s an idea from the StarTrek universe. For the non Sci-fi folk bear with me as the idea is more important than where the idea arrives from.
    Ok so the Kobayashi Maru is an unwinable simulation taught to all would be star ship captains. In brief it works like this there is a ship. The aforementioned Kobayashi Maru. It is in enemy space and has broken down. If you leave it there all the crew will die. If you try and rescue it you will die. Unwinable!
    However, one captain… James T Kirk found a way to beat it. I will tell you how a little later.

    For now that’s where we are at, the game of life = Unwinable.

    I know, I know some people clearly are winning the game of life! They have fame, fortune and glory!

    But for most people they as Theroux quoted live lives of quiet desperation and go to their grave with their song still in them.

    So why does this happen. Well I have a few theories but the main one is that they take bad advice from well meaning people. People like friends, family, teachers and colleagues.

    So what sort of advice keeps you trapped in an unwinable game.

    Work hard in school/University and then get a good job.

    It is better to have someone than be alone.

    Starting your own business is risky.

    Get a job first and you can do what you love later.

    Your own home is an asset.

    Think about this how many people do you know who take this advice?

    Now ask how many of them are happy and are winning the game of life?

    Let me just drive this home. How many out of 100 put a number on it.

    People hate their jobs, stuck in a rut, hate their boss. Hate there partner/spouse, getting divorced. No money, living pay check to paycheck, in debt, massive mortgage hanging over their heads. Looking forward to that two weeks a year when they get to go on a second rate holiday and thinking that it is the bees knees.

    So how many out of the 100?

    It’s not pretty is it!

    So how do we win the Kobayashi Maru?

    Well we do what Captain Kirk did we cheat!

    We break the conventional rules and make our own.

    Kirk reprogrammed the simulation in order to win!

    We are going to do the same with the game of life. We will do this in a systematic way.

    We have a three step plan…

    First,  we are going to learn the rules of the game.

    Second, we are going to play better than the rules.

    Third, we will make our own rules.

    Simple!

    This is where TheSnowHow comes in. We will look to show you just how the game is played. Then show you how to build your skill to beat the game. Then make your own game a game you can win. This will come though observations of what it really take to win the game of life in all its different areas. Things like health, wealth, business, freedom, psychology, success and real happiness.

    We will upgrade your thinking, your knowledge, your performance and your understanding of what it takes to be able to take your life by the scruff of the neck and lift yourself out of the game that other people want to force upon you and go on to be able to win your game.

    If that sounds like something that appeals to you then keep reading. You are just about to swallow the “Red Pill” and see how deep the rabbit hole goes!

    More importantly it should allow you to live long and prosper!

    Snowy.